Sing
praises, Muse, of man who wears a mane,
who
grows a beard magnificent and fair,
and
grieve, O Muse, for man whose chin is plain,
who
dares to scar his face and shave it bare.
A
fuzzy 'stache and sideburns thick with hair
do
form the very badge of manliness;
the
warrior who wills to whiskers wear
rejoices
in his face's shagginess.
Not
so the blockhead who with barrenness
betrays
a baby's chin, bereft and nude.
The
consequence is sickly puniness
and
for his senseless shave he's sorely screwed.
I
beg all men to grow what beard they can.
A
man without a beard is not a man!